Signs of healthy and unhealthy relationships

Improving health also means improving relationships. Know the signs of both healthy and unhealthy relationships.


Michigan State University Extension is committed to helping people improve their lives through education. One way to improve your life is to learn how to improve your relationships. Aspects of a healthy relationship include:
  • Accepting each other as you are.
  • Believing in each other and showing concern for one another.
  • Being a good listener and being open each other’s thoughts and ideas.
  • Showing compassion for one another and being kind to one another.
In addition, the signs of a healthy relationship include:
  • Having more good times in the relationship than bad.
  • Having a life outside the relationship, with your own friends and activities.
  • Making decisions together, with each partner compromising at times.
  • Dealing with conflicts by talking honestly.
  • Feeling comfortable and able to be yourself.
  • Feeling able to take care of yourself.
  • Feeling like your partner supports you.
According to the Office of Women’s Health, US Department of Health and Human Services, sometimes a relationship might not be abusive but might have some problems that make it unhealthy. If you think you might be in an unhealthy relationship, you should be able to talk to your partner about your concerns. If you feel like you can’t talk to your partner, try talking to a trusted friend, family member, or counselor. Consider calling a confidential hotline to get the support you need and to explore next steps. If you’re afraid to end the relationship, call a hotline for help.
Signs of an unhealthy relationship include:
  • Focusing all your energy on your partner.
  • Dropping friends and family or activities you enjoy.
  • Feeling pressured or controlled a lot.
  • Having more bad times in the relationship than good.
  • Feeling sad or scared when with your partner.
Below is a list of possible signs of abuse. Some of these are illegal. All of them are wrong. Your relationship may be abusive if one or more of these things are happening:
  • Your partner monitors what you’re doing all the time.
  • They prevent or discourage you from seeing friends or family or from going to work.
  • They control how you spend your money.
  • They continually humiliate you in front of others.
  • They destroy your property or things that you care about.
  • They hurt you physically (by hitting, beating, pushing, shoving, punching, slapping, kicking, or biting).
If you or someone you care about may be a victim of domestic violence, please reach out to the many resources that may be available in your community. National resources include:

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